Boss: Where were you born?
Philemon: In Zimbabwe
Boss: Which part?
Philemon: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in Zimbabwe.


Philemon and his friend were fixing a bomb in a car.
Friend: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing?
Philemon: Don't worry, I have one more.

Philemon: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but it starts with 'T'.
Philemon: Oh, what a strange car that starts with Tea. All cars I know start

with petrol...

Philemon starts a new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the
computer. Boss very happy and asked what Philemon did till evening.
Philemon: Keyboard letters were not in Alphabetical order, so I fixed it.

Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue you've broken.
Philemon: Thank God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand!

Philemon: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head.
Is he crying?

In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Philemon: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it!
Philemon: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup....

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Philemon: An old king's...
Tourist: Who's that smaller skeleton next to it?
Philemon: That was the same king's skeleton when he was a child.

Philemon: "You know somebody actually complimented me on my driving
today. They left a note on my windscreen, it said, ' parking fine' So that
was nice!"